Pappa wants mamma naked
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
