He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I can't put those talents on a resume
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
