i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
