I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just threw up on my dentist
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize
