You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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