Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize
