highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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