I look better un-naked...
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
