I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize