just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
