I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
You can't motorboat a personality
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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