I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
