Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
3pm strippers are depressing
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
