HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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