her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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