My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
