If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
