I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Swine flu. Run for my life!
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
