Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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