so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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