the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
