i just had sex bonerless
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
