Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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