there was a trapeze. enough said
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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