they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
