if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
