i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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