Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
