If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Randomize
