Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
