The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
