For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
