Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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