Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
