I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
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