Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
