Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
