i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize