I want to stick my p in your. b.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
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