I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
