just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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