that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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