Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize