Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
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