Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
