So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize