this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
