yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
jump out the window naked night went bad
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