my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize
