He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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